What If: The Federal Bureau of Payroll and Performance Review

Kennedy, Daley, Evers, Clark
Kennedy, Daley, Metcalfe, Clark

The Trick To Trust by Dazee Dizzle

By Joy Lynn Clark

11/9/2014

I think there should be a 4th branch of the government: The Federal Bureau of Payroll and Performance Review.  This new branch would be in charge of conducting performance reviews and giving pay raises or cuts to our elected officials in all three branches of the federal government. States might want to get into something like this but it is entirely up to that state.

Of course, this new branch would be elected by the people.  One person from each state.  They get to appoint 2 assistants.  I propose that these assistants be into research.  The Federal Bureau of Payroll and Performance Review would not be deciding cuts and raises over how officials vote but rather, how often they vote.  Are these people doing their jobs  consistently?  It is not enough to have a majority or vice versa.  The public needs to know if their elected official is just doing the bare minimum or if they are working hard.  You can’t get away with not having an obvious voting record.  You can’t not take a stand.  That’s your job.  The public needs to know whether not you are a slacker.

This would be the check and balance that I believe is missing from our giant bureaucracy today.  Too many slackers are making their way in.

Of course, this new branch is gonna cost some money.  I think these 50 people should make a great salary.  We would not want this non-partisan branch to be hard up for cash.  On the other hand, we don’t want them to cost the tax payers too much.  Every voter is gonna have to pitch in $1, during income tax time, no exceptions.

Finally,  The Federal Bureau of Payroll and Performance Review is going have to publish these reports – Before re-election time.  I know what you are thinking, a lot of the things this bureau analyzes are a matter of public record.  Well that sh!t is too damn hard to read.  I actually tried before.  I didn’t even have enough memory on my computer to download the entire document.  Thousands of pages – really fine print.  We can’t leave this stuff up to the media.  I’m not sure if they even understand it.

Therefore, each review would be a one page summary: Politician name,position,salary, picture, a nice pie chart, proposals, committees, voting records, attendance, and finally cut/raise/stay the same.  The American people are going to need some talented and educated people to layout, write, and compile statistics for these.  Don’t worry this bureau is well-funded.  Your average American needs to be able to read this.  These reports will be available for download off of the Bureau’s website.

The Trick To Trust (ho – heaven’s cypher)

I been fighting for my dignity

To prove I’m not a ho so they

Can give to me

The same thing I came with

Nothing at all

And I gotta starve

Amongst all the cat calls

And cats who wanna holler

Can’t do right by name

They ain’t paying me

The whole thing is a shame

Pay me for my work

I don’t hate on your game

No I’m not a ho

I’m open-minded though

Had a  bunch of partners reluctantly

When I want the job done

It’s up to me

Wanted it to work

But it didn’t

I’m not kidding

Thinking back it hurts

Cause I gotta lead

With my virtue first

To guys that’s spending on hos

So sick of being broke though

At least the hos getting promo

Dirty and no good

And not worth much

Can’t get no love

Is tough for any of us

Though it’s just a name

Maybe even untrue

There’s a whole lot of

Damage that it can do

No one trusts a Ho

And that’s it

No one trusts a ho

But a trick

But if you got the name

And you ain’t getting paid

It’s a shame

And it makes me sick

Ho in my book of rhymes

And it’s on the same thing

But only by appearances

Truth is my last one

Was a bit more

And I got this one

On clearances

But being clear is cool

I like deals for my tools

And it’s time to put

Some things on sale

Wanna write a composition

But there’s so much imposition

I just let it all go to hell

Or did it?

I don’t know

Cause I let the thing be

And then it started out all weird

I’ll probably erase it

And rearrange it

And make this one

The song of the year

Gotta sharpen up

And make sure it cuts

Straight from the wav

Through to the page

As it’s floating along

Cause it’s a HO song

And the hos just move along

Dirty and no good

And not worth much

Can’t get no love

Is tough for any of us

Though it’s just a name

Maybe even untrue

There’s a whole lot of

Damage that it can do

No one trusts a Ho

And that’s it

No one trusts a ho

But a trick

But if you got the name

And you ain’t getting paid

It’s a shame

And it makes me sick

You know a lot about Hos

Cause you told me so

Got me out here

Defending my honor

Need to go to HA and

Get me a sponsor

Need to go to Ho-anon

But that might be

What the Hos be on

Wear a shirt from

HO University

So when you start

Cursing me

You know what’s true

Think you know the ho

Cause the ho is you

Dirty and no good

And not worth much

Can’t get no love

Is tough for any of us

Though it’s just a name

Maybe even untrue

There’s a whole lot of

Damage that it can do

No one trusts a Ho

And that’s it

No one trusts a ho

But a trick

But if you got the name

And you ain’t getting paid

It’s a shame

And it makes me sick

Should I speak on Hos for hours

And still get paid

Even if the whole crowd

Walked away

This is how these

6 pages are this night

A few minutes ago

And some in the light

And what two things

Should I compare?

And empty page

Or a plate that’s bare

Or a lengthy speech

Just to appease

A bunch of listeners

That ain’t even there

So I write and write

And they talk and they talk

And I think about the past

In the boots I’ve walked

Cause you can’t guess

But looking at my face

But when I take the mic

I destroy the place

And It’s even worse

When I walk away

You feel the pain

Yet you need me to stay

Just looking for love

Falling for some stupid stuff

Out of curiosity

Now its industry

Joy Clark is a writer, producer, vocalist, and publisher. Lexington, KY

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