Journal

Getting Busy

By Joy Lynn Clark

10/9/2024

After the dust had settled from when I first left my Dad and Stepmom‘s house; then to my own apartment for a few months, and then grandmas for school, I decided to make amends. Even though things were still raw with my folks and I, they agreed to help me with college. Inside I was grateful that Grandma and Pawpaw were there to help me smooth things over. I asked my Dad for tuition, my Mom for books, and my Stepmom for health insurance. Dad and Stepmom pulled through, so I adjusted my attitude. On the other hand, Mom told me to ask Dad, so I kept throwing shade at Mom.  Dad was irritated that I called to ask for more money so I just told him that Mom wouldn’t help me with books.

At school, I met a lot of cool people. My Dean was the best and she reads all of my stuff. I settled into school and work nicely. I even learned my way around Chicago’s Northside.

I telephoned my best friend, Bridgette who is now pregnant and telling me how my ex John is so very sorry about how things went down when we broke up. John freaked out after she and I went on the Jerry Springer Show and I had to get my Paw Paw and my Uncle to help me move up north. He felt so bad that he sent me a huge package that included a North Face jacket, backpack, Walkman, Teddy Bear, money, and sweets for school.  Back in the day, North Face was pricey.   I told my Bestie that I thought that this gift was too extravagant for a breakup present. However, after I felt how warm the jacket was, I decided to keep the items. I asked Grandma and Pawpaw what they thought, “You could send it back“ Grandma and Pawpaw suggested. For weeks I just looked at the stuff. I first took out the Walkman and jammed to school on the train. Next, I separated the outer jacket and just wore the inner one. Finally, when it really got cold, I just zipped the whole thing back together and accepted that even though my ex is crazy, I really just want to keep this stuff and, I need it.  Even the new guy that I started dating thought that I should keep the stuff.   

Life in the suburbs seemed so far away and I just couldn’t relate to all of B’s baby daddy drama and we stopped talking. I was just too busy with school, multiple jobs, performances, and various neighborhood and school organizations.  I felt like a bad friend but, I was really busy.

I had to show proof of health insurance to my college.  Although my parents went to the doctor on the Southside, I found a clinic downtown that was within the network. Mainly, I had check-ups and birth control. My dad also works downtown at the TV Station and I would plan for us to meet, chat, grab lunch, or I’d simply stop by to beg for money. 

My aunt is a grad student who is studying video production and is also downtown. I always made time to hang out with her and her camera guy friend from grad school. The two of them would go in about video production and auntie would say, “put in a good word with your Dad”. I would always respond, “if you guys give me something, I will give it to him.” They were like, “cool”.   This particular time, I get to see his camera and even though I am not that into this stuff, I know that this is an important moment.  This guy had to break down today’s new verbiage – Biracial. I wasn’t feeling it because it sounded more like by Rachel.  So I asked him, “are you half-white?” He told me his last name and I started to wonder if their dad was in the music business. However, I wasn’t up on that old school just yet.

By late fall I was invited to work on their video set on location and Gary, Indiana. We got our first snow and below zero temperature soon after. We worked in an empty jail/courthouse. I got to sit in the audience during the court scenes and the jail was so creepy that I really felt it was more suited for a horror film. However, my real job as a Production assistant was to hand out the lunch which we set up buffet-style. The cast and crew ate their fill and I was freezing. I wasn’t too sure about this jail movie but it was good experience for my resume. I told all of my friends in Chicago about it.

On the other hand, my music producer kept throwing me shade over this Asian-American girl who I thought couldn’t sing or rap and this brother who is a comedian (Both the actress Marvel, and stand –up comedian I ended up seeing on TV). Great for those two but, every time I want a beat the comedian gets it. I eventually try and make beats myself.

I first started sampling. All I had was grandma’s old keyboard and a computer. I wasn’t quite ready to record myself yet but I managed to bring CDs of my own tracks for my live performances. One time, I went over to Steve’s (the producer) to ask for a show CD and he sat me down and said, “I sent your work to some people in New York“. I am excited that he decided to, “shop“ my demo. On the other hand, I am bummed that he won’t give me a copy of anything. For some reason, I couldn’t find any of those old cassette tapes.  Eventually he gives me another copy of a song on cassette tape but, I really couldn’t use it for performance because tape was quickly becoming obsolete. I’ve visited a couple of times later over the music and he had baby mama drama by then so I decided to push forth as a beat maker myself.    

Speaking of New York, my stepmother Denise calls me to, “keep my ears open” because she is traveling to New York to film something for a drug company. When she came back she bragged on and on about the limo and the hotel etc. etc. I was so proud because my step mom is such a personality and I am not surprised that she was a hit. She has so many friends from working at the hospital.

Meanwhile, I head back to campus and run for vice president of student government along with my honor Society buddy, “David Alfaro” who was SGA president.  He eventually became a local politician.

I felt like the big guy on campus as a Sophomore at two year city College.  Other than being seriously broke, things were going well.

I had lots of friends and plenty of cool things to do. I even visited a couple of my high school buddies at Howard University. They had an awesome homecoming in DC where I saw Busta Rhymes and heard DC Gogo music for the first time in the club. What was really funny was that even though Howard is an HBCU (Historically black college or university) my friend had the nerve to have a white European girl as a classmate. I asked her if she felt out of place at an HBCU and she told me that she was planning on working at a magazine.  I almost thought that she was better off going to my school. On the other hand, no one seemed bothered by it and, I think that is progress!

I loved the clubs in DC but I hated the cabbies. Our group was pretty big and we wanted one of those “van” type of cabs but we ended up piling into a very small car. One of their university friends had to get out and puke. The cabbie made us all get out and he sped off. We had to walk miles back to the University and it was quite a distance. In the morning I struggled to wake up but, I visited my friend’s business class where they are required to wear suits. I am so glad that I don’t have to do this at my school.  I miss Chicago already.

Joy Clark is a writer, producer, vocalist, and publisher. Lexington, KY