Beach Glass

By Joy Lynn Clark

04/18/2026

It was the summer of 2004 or 2005 when I met my son’s father at the studio.  I had never worked with my step niece-cousin before but I was excited. I called her my cousin because we were the exact same age even though she was my step niece really. People would shake their heads as I tried to explain to them that she is my stepbrother’s half sisters stepdaughter. She had just moved to the north side of Chicago from Dayton OH.

When we arrived at the studio, we were stuck in the waiting area because the last group was still in session. My cousin offered to braid my hair and I happily accepted. We sat there for hours on end. It took so long that my cousin braided my entire head. After some time, we decided to peak back in the recording area and they finally seemed to be wrapping up.

Finally I was introduced to, “The Rasta (with locks tightly wound in a head wrap) as it was explained that this is his studio. I smiled and recounted to him that I remember when this unit was an incense factory and it still smells good. Next, my future baby daddy was introduced and I thought that he was so hot! I touched my cornrows and decided to myself that I still look OK but I am feeling kind of hood with these cornrows right about now.  He quickly offers me a ride home and my step niece leaves out with Bunny.

My future baby daddy and I chatted as he drove me the few blocks back to my apartment. He explains that he is an engineer and is regretful that there wasn’t enough time for us. We exchanged numbers and I can’t believe that I kept on gawking about this man. I had to ring my cousin about the ride.

 “OMG he is so fine!” Although I really like that studio if those guys are just going to have us sitting around you should probably just do the song at my place.” She agrees and we plan our next session. 

One day my cousin calls me practically in tears and tells me that she is leaving her man and has nowhere to go.  I really know about bad breakups and I let her come to my place until she comes up with a plan.  I even give her a copy of my house keys.

My cousin next invites me to a place that’s still on the Northside but west. I normally go to spots downtown but I decide to check out this place that she would go to. It was an old Friars Brewery. We had a good time and I had had one too many drinks. It was nearly time for the bar to close when we go into the washroom to check our makeup. My cousin starts to tell me how her child’s father… OK so tipsy I wasn’t even really paying attention as I stare into the mirror and say, “that’s OK because you’re still a fine ass bitch anyway…” Shockingly my cousin storms out of the club and leaves me slightly smashed. I couldn’t believe her! I had one of those prepaid phones with minutes and I call her. “I left you because you called me a bitch! She replies. “I didn’t call you a bitch; well I didn’t mean it like that. How am I supposed to get home?” I beg.  “You figure it out” She answers.  I was super broke and I looked up at the bus stop and it doesn’t even start running again until 6:00 AM.

I dug through my purse and found my lipstick, a few single bills, and a phone number. I quickly dialed that fine ass dread from the studio. “I can try and pick you up when I finish this session…” he offers. “OK”, I answer as I walk into the convenience store and spare a dollar for a small coffee and hold on to the rest just in case I’ve got to catch the bus.

Sitting on the bus stop was scary.   All I could think about was how I was going to snap on my cousin for leaving me over here. Where the hell am I anyway? I usually party in the Gold coast. I can’t believe that she got so mad! She broke the code. You don’t leave your girl tipsy at a bar! She has no morals. If the shoe were on the other foot I would have forced her into the cab with me if I had to! Plus the deal was that I used my cash to buy the drinks and she pays the cab.  She even reneged on the deal that we made and she knows that I was broke because I held up my end by buying the drinks. It was her responsibility to get us home. It is not safe for a female to be sitting out here in the middle of the night on the bus stop!

I almost could have caught the bus when my future baby daddy shows up. I recounted the story and added that, “I’m going to throw all her luggage the outside when I get home! I can’t believe that I gave this chick the keys to my place!”

I got on the phone and called my girl Charlotte and recounted the whole story. Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of venting to her and she probably thinks that I have nothing but problems. “She just left her man … I let her leave her stuff here. I even gave her a copy of the house keys… after I get off the phone I’m going to throw her shit in the street!” I spat. “Meditate and think about getting out some of that anger in a positive way and remember the most high . . . God’s plan for you . . . higher power . . .drops in oceans etcetera etcetera…” I take a deep breath and exhale. Eventually I calm down and realize that maybe I should give her another chance.

On the other hand, three days pass and no word from her.   I am upset again because nothing is important to her. Should I call her parents?  Do I need to file a missing person’s report?  I don’t know where this chick is.  She could have gotten kidnapped the night she left me at the bar.  What if she is broke in the street somewhere? How come she hasn’t called to at least check in? What if I wasn’t safe? How do I know that she is even OK? I glance over at her luggage and begin to get mad all over again.

In the meantime I decide to go into my living room and plug in my gear. I start making some hard Electro tracks like, “straight from the go” and, “in love with the Mac” I was really checking out this new kit and I was starting to like the songs that I’m making with it.  Eventually my step-niece cousin and I fall out hard enough for her to make up with her man and go home.

I finally decide to stick to my much closer relatives and ring Raye up. Miss is still doing that dance production in the South and she probably could use the company.  We all decide to go out together with my future baby daddy, friends, and cousin Raye. We didn’t do anything really special but we all piled into baby daddy’s big ass Lincoln with the tinted windows (which was a police magnet) and we all just decided to hang out by the lakefront. I really didn’t know all of these Evanston kids (Evanston is a suburb just north of Chicago). Baby daddy brought along some hippie dread guys and this wild haired brother named, “Teegi”. I figured he was maybe Asian or native or something like that. Ray loves Teegi and I love baby daddy!   We all talk **** walked, collected shells and colorful city rocks (which is a glass shard that has been smoothed in the sand over time usually from broken bottles). By this point, future baby daddy was my official boyfriend and Raye is pining over Teegi. “I tried to call Teegi but he hasn’t called me back.” Raye sighs. I decided to call Ben and he responds like he doesn’t know because he really didn’t know that guy very well.

Eventually I get my stepbrother on the phone. “I know that you didn’t really keep in touch with your step-niece but she and I remained friends throughout the years.  We even recorded a couple of songs together and she has moved up here to the north side.” I explained to my step brother who is also the same age as I am. He then goes on to tell me that he is going to go play paintball with his Air Force buddies if I am interested. “who is going?” I ask. “Tony, Mike, and a couple of other friends.” He explains. “No, I’m going to stay here in the city” I replied.

Eventually I did have that baby with Ben and we broke up. That very next year I brought my baby down to Christmas with the family and I hand out those custom Christmas cards with my baby’s picture printed on them. Dad, stepmother, new boyfriend, step-brother and friends all show up. I start to open my stack of Christmas cards and the first one that I open is signed Tony Gus, T. G.   I look over at Tony and laugh, “I didn’t know that your last name is Gus!”  “I don’t know how I’m going to explain this one to Raye”,   I think to myself.